Loss of a loved one, separation, breakdown of relationships and irreconcilable differences all lead to a grieving process. Some come out of it quickly but for many it becomes a lifelong scar, a bad memory or apath they can no longer tread.
Loss of faith in love and the goodness in life leaves one depressed and helpless. There is no motivation to make new relationships or nurture existing ones. Nor is there the will to try something new to refresh one’s thinking.
What are some of the reasons for which it is hard to let go and move on?
Is the loss of love or attachment to others so toxic that it breaks one down to the extent of self-destruction?
Is the self-respect so battered that it is almost impossible to get back on track?
Has the incident tarnished the soul so badly that there seems no hope of return or rejuvenation?
The way forward
Basically there are just two possibilities:
- Live in self-pity, anger or despair and indirectly punish others around you by making them your emotional punching bag.
- Accept your situation and emotions and grow with it positively with a new outlook and renewed energy to take life head-on.
The second option is more sustaining and maybe the only choice for a healthy and happy life in order to build new and happy memories. If we remain stuck in our fears and guilt and continue to dwell on the past, we will continue to remain in our past.
Past is past
When we keep looking behind and are stuck in our past, we don’t have room to look at the present and future. We block out the love, attention and understanding others around us are showing. We do not have space for new people in our lives and over time drive away those who have been around for a very long time.
Being attached to the past is like weeds in a garden that not only choke the life out of beautiful, productive plants but also suck the nutrients out of the soil, out of the surrounding environment.
A bad past experience, loss, grief and not being able to move on slowly take over the person and personality and, before we realise it,we have become different people.
Forgive yourself and those around you. Forgive yourself for lost opportunities, past mistakes and ‘things that would have or could have’ been. While it is difficult to forget what others have done, it is important to forgive.Too often we contemplate too much, think too much and plan too much and are overwhelmed with our own thoughts. This leaves very little room for forgiveness because we are too busy trying to find reasons for what happened. We keep going around in circles to find an answer that will satisfy us.
Change your attitude
If your thought pattern is changed, your attitude towards life will change because you will become empowered.
Meditation is a great way of transforming your thoughts, building your self-esteem and accumulating power within you. With practice and a desire to make a change, the thought patterns can change automatically and the negative thoughts and emotions will slowly fade away.
The process of forgiving yourself and others will not happen overnight and it is important to give yourself and those around you time to accept and understand.
Letting go helps recognise the happy moments, the success that you have achieved and with time you learn to appreciate all those who are around you.
You learn to appreciate yourself and recognise your strengths and build on them.
While family and friends will continue to be there to support you, your inner strength will ensure that you are not dependent on anyone.
As your meditation increases so will your power to face and your power to accept increase.
Your level of self-confidence will increase and gradually faith in love and the goodness in life will also return.
Brahma Kumaris in Australia
The Brahma Kumaris have had a presence in Australia since 1975. There are centres and class locations in the major cities, as well as three Centres for Spiritual Learning, where courses, classes and retreats are held. Brahma Kumaris Australia is a registered charity in the area of education (spiritual). All programs are offered free of charge as a service to the community. The ongoing operations are funded through donations from students and the public in the spirit of maintaining its educational services for the benefit of all in the community.